So, my sister was talking to me about that Ashley Madison website, only she keeps calling it Dolly Madison. I’m like, It’s cheaters, not cupcakes.
If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?
I’m going to have to go with allegedly.
He smacked his girlfriend while they were in the elevator. It was all over the news. Millions of people saw the footage. He hit his girlfriend…ALLEGEDLY.
Ten people saw him pick up the gun and blow his brains out. He committed suicide…ALLEGEDLY.
I’m going to the store…ALLEGEDLY.
Who knows. On my way there I might get abducted by aliens and dropped at the automat instead. What’s an automat? It’s kind of like a restaurant where you get all of your food out of vending machines…ALLEGEDLY.
Allegedly is literally the most obnoxious word ever. Literally is the second most obnoxious. Obnoxious is the third most obnoxious word, thereby cancelling itself out and NOT being an obnoxious word…ALLEGEDLY.